Pegging

So you’ve mastered entry level butt play (starting here) and now you’re ready to step it up with pegging. Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of things, it can be tricky territory to navigate with a partner.

Before I dive in (so to speak), for those who aren’t familiar…pegging is when one partner penetrates the other with a strap-on toy. Pegging isn’t limited to any specific gender or orientation, but most often it is associated with role reversal in cishet dynamics (aka a woman penetrating a man). In particular, I want to talk about penis owners being on the receiving end of things.

We all know I am a huge advocate for butt play on penis owners and there are some great benefits taking it to the next level:

• Intense P-spot stimulation and possible prostate orgasms
• Reversal of the usual penetration power dynamic (penis owners can be truly submissive)
• Deeper intimacy and connection with a partner
• Increased empathy with what your partner experiences during PIV sex (respect to penis owners for all that thrusting!)

So how do you broach the topic with a partner?:

• As always, raise the idea outside the bedroom when the pressure is off
• Express why you want to explore pegging (physical pleasure/dynamic reversal/increased intimacy etc)
• Answer your partner’s questions and help them understand what they might gain from the experience too (I personally love having complete control over a man’s pleasure)

If you get the green light with enthusiastic consent, get prepped for go time by:

• Researching together and discussing how to proceed so you are both comfortable
• Having all the right equipment (my recommendations are here)
• Prep by douching/cleaning if you feel the need or it makes you and your partner more comfortable
• Ease in with foreplay, rimming and finger play
• Lube, lube, lube…and some more lube (water based only – oil and silicone based can degrade condoms and silicone toys)
• Go slow and experiment with different positions that work for you and your partner

As always, use condoms on shared toys for safety and be prepared for mess with towels and tissues. Be patient with this if you are trying as a cishet couple…it’s territory that will be out of both your comfort zones. It might take a few times to perfect what works for you both and don’t forget the aftercare…cuddle, chat and take care of each other in the way that suits you after pegging.