As a feminist who highlights the poor behaviour of men, people think I hate all men. I don’t…I love men and I think patriarchy makes life harder for them. Men deserve more, can be more and I have great hope for them…
My hope for men is to unlearn the scripts from their childhood. To know ‘boys don’t cry’, ‘boys will be boys’ and ‘man up’ are damaging masculine narratives. To be free to express themselves in healthy ways and stop seeing ‘feminine’ qualities as weak.
My hope for men is to talk to other men about their feelings. To go beyond the superficial and discuss the difficult things impacting their lives. To have deeper bonds with other men and foster a real community beyond just ‘having a beer and watching the game’.
My hope for men is to break free of masculine stereotypes and understand there’s no one way to be a man. To realise notions like ‘provider’ and ‘protector’ are outdated. To know that being a man means being yourself and being a good human, not some fictional image of what a man should be.
My hope for men is that they embrace personal growth. To acknowledge shortcomings and mistakes, to take accountability when they do wrong and evolve. To take responsibility and actively become better versions of themselves all the time.
My hope for men is to prioritise their mental wellbeing. To admit when they are struggling and to get help. To know that caring for their mental health and being vulnerable takes more courage than pretending they’re ok.
My hope for men is to use their privilege to advocate for others. To embrace kindness and empathy, hold space for women and other minorities. To be a voice for change rather than sit back and say ‘not all men’.
My hope for men is to support and encourage their male friends to be and do better. To have the hard conversations and challenge each other to raise the bar on men’s behaviour. To not stay silent perpetuate dangerous lad culture.
My hope for men is to live up to their potential and be the wonderful humans I know they can be. To be themselves without feeling the need to act a certain way as a man.
What’s your hope for men?
Madam Mayhem 
Is it not possible to be all these things and use masculine strength responsibly to be both “provider” and “protector”? After all, who cares for the weak if not rhe strong?
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I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying?
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You’ve said you think “provuder” and “protector” are outdated. I think they are positive and necessary roles, and as someone in a position to fulfil those roles, it is my responsibility to fulfill them. But that doesn’t preclude me from acknowledging and addressing my failures and weaknesses, nor does it mean I can’t be kind and compassionate.
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I agree, if you choose to take on those roles, great. And yes, they can exist while you address the other things. I’m saying I’d like men to shed the feeling that they HAVE to be that, purely because they are a man. There are also many ways to be a protector and provider that don’t include earning the money for the household. Men can be caregivers, protect by teaching their sons about consent etc. I’m just saying the old, traditional roles are rigid and need to be questioned…which you are doing.
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As a man that generally doesn’t fit with the big strong protector role I found this to be a lovely and reassuring read. Thank you 🙂
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I’m so glad…I’ve had mixed responses so I’m grateful for the feedback it has resonated with you!
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