Relationships – Madam Mayhem

Lower Your Standards

It’s the latest hetero buzz narrative on social media…cishet women supposedly wanting a 6’5, blue eyed finance man with a trust fund. I’m sure you’ve seen it. Society is always telling women their dating standards are too high and to lower their expectations for a male partner, but should we? For starters, I’ve literally neverContinue reading “Lower Your Standards”

Switch Myths

I think being a switch is both a blessing and a curse. Theoretically we have the best of both worlds…in reality it’s not so simple. We tend to hear a lot about those who are purely Dominant or submissive, but what are some of the myths about us switches? • Switches can have more playmatesContinue reading “Switch Myths”

Mayhem’s 2024 Lessons

I thought I’d start the year reflecting on some lessons I learnt in 2024 (kind of like last year when I made my list of ins and outs). While it felt like the world was regressing, I actually celebrated growth in most areas of my life (including my biceps). This is what last year taughtContinue reading “Mayhem’s 2024 Lessons”

Baggage

Earlier this year I went on four dates with an older man who didn’t fail to tell me on a regular basis that I brought ‘complications’ to the table. He was referring to Madam Mayhem and considered my sexual openness ‘baggage’. Yet he praised me for being so understanding that he was back living withContinue reading “Baggage”

Unsolicited Advice

I’ve had my fair share of people (mostly men, let’s be real) try to give me advice on everything from dating and job hunting to gym and diet (I’ve been vegan eight years and haven’t died yet). I’m a 42 year old woman with two degrees who’s moved countries five times and started three businessesContinue reading “Unsolicited Advice”

Messing With Married

I’m not proud to admit I have a history of pursuing people who weren’t single. While I’ve never cheated on a partner and never would, my moral compass definitely lead me astray in this area. We all make mistakes and my phase of ‘messing with married’ caused a lot of harm to myself and othersContinue reading “Messing With Married”

The Swipe Experiment II

I did another Swipe Experiment (nope, still not a masochist despite evidence to the contrary) which was different from the first one I did in 2021. Last time my dating goal was to find a FWB…this time I’m at a place in my dating journey where I’m wanting a relationship. I state this on myContinue reading “The Swipe Experiment II”

Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped

Madam Mayhem was originally born so I could talk about my dating and kink journey. The hope being that by sharing my experiences it might help others on their own journey. So in that spirit I’m doing a ‘Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped’ (spoiler alert…it’s been a terrible year for dating). Dating Stats: Reasons Dates Didn’t Progress:Continue reading “Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped”

Dating Self Confidence

Much like dealing with rejection, dating self confidence takes practise. Shifting your mindset from ‘I have to make this person like me’ to ‘Let’s see if we are compatible’ is the biggest hurdle. Dating is as much about whether you like them as they like you. If you spend all your time trying to impressContinue reading “Dating Self Confidence”

Mayhem’s Kinks Part I

If you’ve been following me for a while you might know some of my kinks (I’m not quiet about them), but I thought I’d share the current list (refer to number four…I just can’t help myself). • Experimentalism • I feel like a mad scientist sometimes…concocting ideas for playtime and constantly craving the thrill ofContinue reading “Mayhem’s Kinks Part I”