Madam Mayhem was originally born so I could talk about my dating and kink journey. The hope being that by sharing my experiences it might help others on their own journey. So in that spirit I’m doing a ‘Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped’ (spoiler alert…it’s been a terrible year for dating).
Dating Stats:
- 17 First dates
- 6 Second dates
- 2 Third dates
- 0 Relationships (or anything beyond a third date)
Reasons Dates Didn’t Progress:
- 5 lacked chemistry
- 4 were time wasters too busy to date
- 4 ghosted me
- Distance became an issue with 2
- 2 wanted different things from dating
Dating Apps That Banned Me:
- Feeld (twice)
- Hinge (twice)
- Tinder
*I also had a warning on Bumble
(I’ve managed to get back on all the apps)
Top Performing Dating Apps/Websites:
- Hinge (5)
- Fabswingers (4)
- Tinder & Feeld (2 each)
- Bumble & Grazer (1 each)
*I met 2 people organically (1 through work, 1 at Eroticon)
Kink Events Attended:
- Eroticon
- London Alternative Market
- Torture Garden Halloween
- Seed Talk: The Psychology of Fetish & Kink
Random Wrapped Stats:
- I went 7 (long) months without sex
- All my dates were with (cis and trans) men
- The average age of my dates was 28
- Discovered I have a ‘corruption’ kink
- I developed a taste for shibari
As you can see, the dating life of a kinky cougar is not what you might think. I continue to be an invisible queer who mostly attracts cis men and can’t match with women to save my life. But 2023 wasn’t a complete loss…I made one lifelong friend from dating and invested about 260 hours in my long term relationship with the gym…
Madam Mayhem 
2 thoughts on “Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped”