It’s the latest hetero buzz narrative on social media…cishet women supposedly wanting a 6’5, blue eyed finance man with a trust fund. I’m sure you’ve seen it. Society is always telling women their dating standards are too high and to lower their expectations for a male partner, but should we? For starters, I’ve literally neverContinue reading “Lower Your Standards”
Category Archives: online dating
Mayhem’s 2024 Lessons
I thought I’d start the year reflecting on some lessons I learnt in 2024 (kind of like last year when I made my list of ins and outs). While it felt like the world was regressing, I actually celebrated growth in most areas of my life (including my biceps). This is what last year taughtContinue reading “Mayhem’s 2024 Lessons”
Baggage
Earlier this year I went on four dates with an older man who didn’t fail to tell me on a regular basis that I brought ‘complications’ to the table. He was referring to Madam Mayhem and considered my sexual openness ‘baggage’. Yet he praised me for being so understanding that he was back living withContinue reading “Baggage”
Messing With Married
I’m not proud to admit I have a history of pursuing people who weren’t single. While I’ve never cheated on a partner and never would, my moral compass definitely lead me astray in this area. We all make mistakes and my phase of ‘messing with married’ caused a lot of harm to myself and othersContinue reading “Messing With Married”
The Swipe Experiment II
I did another Swipe Experiment (nope, still not a masochist despite evidence to the contrary) which was different from the first one I did in 2021. Last time my dating goal was to find a FWB…this time I’m at a place in my dating journey where I’m wanting a relationship. I state this on myContinue reading “The Swipe Experiment II”
Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped
Madam Mayhem was originally born so I could talk about my dating and kink journey. The hope being that by sharing my experiences it might help others on their own journey. So in that spirit I’m doing a ‘Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped’ (spoiler alert…it’s been a terrible year for dating). Dating Stats: Reasons Dates Didn’t Progress:Continue reading “Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped”
Dating Self Confidence
Much like dealing with rejection, dating self confidence takes practise. Shifting your mindset from ‘I have to make this person like me’ to ‘Let’s see if we are compatible’ is the biggest hurdle. Dating is as much about whether you like them as they like you. If you spend all your time trying to impressContinue reading “Dating Self Confidence”
Creepy Moves
Dating is a minefield at the best of times and we’ve all said and done things we regret. These are usually innocent missteps you can get past quickly. But there’s also a host of creepy moves that are sure to make someone feel really uneasy and lose you a potential date. • Location • MentioningContinue reading “Creepy Moves”
How to Lose a Match in 10 Seconds
Most dating app profiles I see look like they’ve been generated by the same terrible advice page on the internet (they’ve clearly not taken all my good advice on how to make a great online dating profile!). With thousands of profiles to choose from, looking the same as everyone else really doesn’t cut it. LotsContinue reading “How to Lose a Match in 10 Seconds”
Women and Casual Sex
I recently got into a heated debate with an old (cis het male) colleague over his belief that ‘women can get sex when they want, men get sex when they can’ and that women ‘biologically’ need an emotional connection to enjoy sex. Let me make this very clear…plenty of women want casual sex and trustContinue reading “Women and Casual Sex”
Madam Mayhem 