Author Archives: Madam Mayhem

Submissive Myths

A while back I wrote about Dominant myths…now it’s time to explore some of the falsehoods around submissives (don’t worry my fellow switches, we’ll be up next). Much like ‘Dominant’ can conjure up inaccurate stereotypes of whips and black latex, there are plenty of misconceptions around subs… Subs don’t have any control Even if aContinue reading “Submissive Myths”

Unsolicited Advice

I’ve had my fair share of people (mostly men, let’s be real) try to give me advice on everything from dating and job hunting to gym and diet (I’ve been vegan eight years and haven’t died yet). I’m a 42 year old woman with two degrees who’s moved countries five times and started three businessesContinue reading “Unsolicited Advice”

Messing With Married

I’m not proud to admit I have a history of pursuing people who weren’t single. While I’ve never cheated on a partner and never would, my moral compass definitely lead me astray in this area. We all make mistakes and my phase of ‘messing with married’ caused a lot of harm to myself and othersContinue reading “Messing With Married”

The Swipe Experiment II

I did another Swipe Experiment (nope, still not a masochist despite evidence to the contrary) which was different from the first one I did in 2021. Last time my dating goal was to find a FWB…this time I’m at a place in my dating journey where I’m wanting a relationship. I state this on myContinue reading “The Swipe Experiment II”

Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped

Madam Mayhem was originally born so I could talk about my dating and kink journey. The hope being that by sharing my experiences it might help others on their own journey. So in that spirit I’m doing a ‘Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped’ (spoiler alert…it’s been a terrible year for dating). Dating Stats: Reasons Dates Didn’t Progress:Continue reading “Mayhem’s 2023 Wrapped”

My Hope For Men

As a feminist who highlights the poor behaviour of men, people think I hate all men. I don’t…I love men and I think patriarchy makes life harder for them. Men deserve more, can be more and I have great hope for them… My hope for men is to unlearn the scripts from their childhood. ToContinue reading “My Hope For Men”

Toys Are Teammates

‘You don’t need toys, you have me’ is one of my top red flag statements to hear when it comes to sex. Of course we all want to feel desired and enough for someone during sex, but we need to stop looking at toys like they are a threat…they are our teammates. Shaming someone forContinue reading “Toys Are Teammates”

Locktober 2023

It’s that time of year again…no not Halloween…something scarier…Locktober. The month of October is a chance for all the submissives out there to experience chastity for 31 days. If you’ve never tried being locked up in a chastity cage or belt (no, you don’t need a peen to participate), this might be your chance toContinue reading “Locktober 2023”