Much like general comments on my appearance, I’ve always struggled to accept a compliment about my body or looks. Recently I’ve developed a really strong aversion to it…especially from people on the dating apps. I think there are a few reasons why I don’t enjoy compliments about how I look… I understand that particularly withContinue reading “Compliments”
Tag Archives: dating
Mayhem Myths
I’ve had Madam Mayhem for two years now and the assumptions people make about me because of her is wild. I receive daily messages (mostly from cis men) with absurd misconceptions…so I want to bust the Mayhem myths.
Not All Men
Trigger Warning: harassment, abuse, assault, rape. Saying ‘not all men’ doesn’t help. We know it’s not all (cis) men, but all men benefit from the ‘bad’ ones because it lowers the bar on behaviour. Oh, you don’t harass or rape people? Not violating another human doesn’t make you a ‘nice guy’, it just makes youContinue reading “Not All Men”
Virginity
Let’s get one thing clear…virginity is a social construct. You aren’t suddenly a different person once you’ve had sex for the first time and what constitutes ‘sex’ looks different for everyone, so how can it be measured? The idea of virginity is completely fictional and shouldn’t play any part in dictating someone’s sexual identity orContinue reading “Virginity”
Commenting on Appearance
We live in a superficial time where there’s a strong emphasis on appearance. We see the best (and often untrue) depiction of people online with filters, good lighting and all the right angles. It’s warped the reality that we are all beautiful in our own unique, imperfect ways. It’s also created a culture where peopleContinue reading “Commenting on Appearance”
Sugar Mommas
I’ve been asked to be a sugar momma at least once a week since I started dating again two years ago. Usually this request comes without so much as a ‘hello’…it’s just some guy in his twenties sliding into my DMs thinking I’ll be happy to pay for his (no doubt charming) company. The ideaContinue reading “Sugar Mommas”
Fake Dominants
There’s no shame in being a newbie to the kink scene. We all have to start somewhere and if you’re honest with potential playmates about your experience and play is safe and consensual, there’s no harm done. What’s dangerous is posing as an experienced dominant when you aren’t one. Not everyone is honest about theirContinue reading “Fake Dominants”
Simping
The original meaning of the term ‘simping’ is to crush on someone at a distance. An infatuation from afar which has you doing things wildly out of character for the object of your affection. It’s usually applied in the context of men’s behaviour towards women. The term however has now devolved and is mostly usedContinue reading “Simping”
Sliding Into Someone’s DMs
Even with so many dating apps available these days, social media is a common way to meet people. Some love it, some hate it…but one thing is for sure, there’s a right way to go about it if you want to slide into someone’s DMs. Before you even send the first message, bear in mindContinue reading “Sliding Into Someone’s DMs”
Controversial Dating App Ideas
After two years on the dating apps and encountering the same problems with matches (remember my swipe experiment?!), I have some controversial ideas to make online dating a much better experience for everyone. My controversial dating apps ideas are: • Therapy should be a mandatory prerequisite for signing up. • You must provide evidence thatContinue reading “Controversial Dating App Ideas”